I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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