love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
