i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
