sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
