Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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