I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
