but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
