I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize