I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Randomize
