The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
