There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
