I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Randomize
