You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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