His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
