so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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