Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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