Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Randomize
