Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
