apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
