Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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