we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
