Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
