party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
