In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
just tell him i said nine months
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Randomize
