wat bout pragnant strippers??
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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