so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
