OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Randomize
