i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
