She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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