Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
