Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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