So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
