U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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