ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
