We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Threesome in a minivan. New low
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
