Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
