I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
You're like the curious george of whores
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
