So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
