She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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