4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize