ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
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Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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