i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
