I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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