I love black thongs
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
im six kinds of drunk right now
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
