barbara walters just said penis...
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
