she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
