Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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