I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
that is very illegal...i love you.
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