you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
