You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Randomize
